Imam Khamenei's recommendations to youth on marriage

Preserve the affection that God has placed in your hearts

 If there is affection in life, the difficulties outside of home will become easy [to deal with]. Similarly for the women, the difficulties inside home will become easy.

November 2, 1998

In marriage, the most important thing is affection. Boys and girls know this; preserve the affection that God has placed in your hearts.

January 7, 1996

Young couples should feel affection for each other because affection is the means that will make their relationship stable and persistent; it will prevent a relationship from breaking. Affection is very good. Affection brings loyalty.

Exchange of Marriage Vows; December 15, 1997


Live a simple, modest life as a couple

Keep life simple; we are not very pious, though. Don't think the simplicity I call for is as practised by the ascetic. By simplicity, I mean simple compared to the current trends. If those ascetic, pious men see our simplicity, they might find many faults with it.
August 2, 1995

Be content [do not want more of the material things]; don't feel ashamed of contentment. Some people think that contentment is for the poor, and if you have much money, you no longer need to be content. No, contentment means being satisfied with the necessary and essential. 

March 30, 1997

Expecting a lot of material things leads to difficult livelihood and unhappiness. If a man wants little for his life, then he will live a happy life.  This is not only good for the hereafter but good for the material world as well.

Exchange of Marriage Vows; March 11, 2001


Wealth and beauty, or piety?

If one gets married for the sake of wealth and beauty, the Almighty God may, according to the narrations, give them wealth and beauty; or He may not give them those. But if they get married for piety and chastity, the Almighty God will give them wealth, and beauty, too. One might say that beauty cannot be acquired; people either are or are not beautiful! It means that because beauty is in your eyes and in your heart, even if someone is not very beautiful if you like them you will see them beautiful. When you don’t like someone, no matter how beautiful they are, you won’t find them beautiful.

Exchange of Marriage Vows; January 3, 1999

Marriage doesn’t bring about difficult livelihood

An issue that was discussed as a peripheral issue - but that is not peripheral to me and that is an important issue - is the issue of youth's marriage [students laugh and make noises indicating support]. We knew that you would have such a reaction to this issue. The issue of youth's marriage is an important issue. I fear that this indifferent outlook towards the issue of marriage - unfortunately, this indifferent outlook exists more or less today - will have terrible consequences for the future of the country.

You brought up the issue of military service, but in my opinion, the issue of military service is not a difficult issue. It is possible to think about and work on this issue. The solution for the problem of military service as an obstacle in the way of marriage is not that we shorten the term. We can adopt other methods for this problem, but it remains an issue. The motivation for marriage should turn into a practical measure. That is to say, marriage should be promoted.

Allah the Exalted says, "If they are in poverty, Allah will give them means out of His grace" [The Holy Quran, 24: 32]. This is a divine promise. We should trust this promise as we trust other divine promises. Marriage and starting a family has not made and will not make individuals experience hard living conditions. This means that one does not necessarily go through rough times because of marriage- on the contrary- marriage may solve the problems of individuals.

The academic environment is a good and appropriate environment for preparing the ground for marriage. In my opinion, youth themselves, their families and officials in charge of universities should think about and make a decision about the issue of youth's marriage. We should not allow the age of marriage - which has unfortunately gone up today, particularly among women - to continue going up.

There are certain wrong notions and traditions that are highly problematic. These wrong traditions are an obstacle in the way of promoting marriage among youth. Therefore, they should be practically broken. In my opinion, you - who are young, inquiring and enthusiastic and you who suggest breaking many habits and traditions - you should break the wrong traditions that exist on the issue of marriage. This is another issue that I deem necessary to stress.

Of course, it was common in the past for a number of well-intentioned matchmakers and religious individuals to act as intermediaries and to introduce eligible women and men to one another. In this way, they helped them get married. Such tasks should be carried out. There should really be a movement in society in this regard.

Jul 23, 2014


  • Islam
  • Marriage
  • Marriage of Imam Ali (a) and Lady Fatima (a)
  • The youth
  • Wedding